You've won a mansion, Luigi
Don't question it, it's legit; no bulls***.
It may be crumbling and creepy,
But much more space than the tiny place you split.
Luigi, hello! Welcome to my hut!
I'm professor E. Gadd--stop scratching your butt.
This mansion appeared in a big puff of doom!
And it's dusty as s***, here: Take this vacuum.
Your brother gets a world, and a land, and a mouse,
He gets a GALAXY! You get a f**king house.
By the way, he's here, but he's feeling sad,
He's stuck in a painting, which is suddenly bad.
Come in and join us Luigi,
Maybe you'll make a new friend, a ghoul-friend!
Your pants may be full of pee-pee,
But once you're in here, the fun will never end.
You get a launch title, make the most of out it!
Get a free mansion? Take the ghosts out of it!
I teach you to Ghostbust, it's easy enough
Just sucky-sucky-sucky, and clean up the white stuff.
The mansion isn't real, just go in and suck it up!
The money's real though, so Scrooge McDuck it up!
There's butlers and grannies and babies, so go!
And if you get scared, just yell "Mario!"
Are you fed up with this tune yet?
It is the one song you hear, yes one. ONE.
So though it grates at the onset,
It won't last long, seven hours and you're done.
Can't I just be in Mario Sunshine?